What The Lord Said To Me Today
Bitter Roots

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Hebrews 12:14-15

"Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord. Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up may trouble you, and thereby many be defiled."

God confronted me with this scripture today. He told me that I harbored some bitterness toward him. I had to admit that it is there, and I'm ashamed of it. You see, God has wounded me in the past: he has led me into situations where I was hurt deeply and I can see no reason for it in the natural. I can see very little that was accomplished.

Now, I know that this is wrong. And I repent of it, but it creeps back into me. You see, God showed it to me after I had confronted a relative about her bitterness toward her ex-husband. She has not forgotten one thing he ever did to her. The acts of abuse are constantly upon her lips, ready to be poured out to any hearer, and she is offended that I will not listen to her and in fact regard her as having a serious problem.

She is a Christian, since her youth, yet she can't seem to let these past hurts go. She says that she has forgiven her ex, but her words tell another story that her facial expressions confirm when she talks about the abuse.

I was pretty hard on her. I let her have the whole unforgiveness sermon with both barrels. And then, the Lord meted it back to me the way I had meted it out to her. The Lord showed me my own bitterness toward him.

You know what? I'm as powerless to do anything about it of my own self as this dear lady is to do anything about her feelings. Unless Jesus comes in and removes these roots, I am powerless.

The bible tells us to forgive, but how can I forget? How can I come to the place where I trust my Lord with everything in my life again? I say that I trust him, but do I REALLY trust him if I'm harboring bitterness toward a time in my life when "it pleased the Lord to bruise His son?"

I know my Lord's response is the same to me as it was to Job: Where were you? And my humble reply is to retract and to humbly repent before him; to say that I do not fully know him; I do not understand the totality of the revelation of God. I am so finite and limited, and God is not a man.

I am so weak, yet I have the mind of Christ, and can behold all mysteries.

Oh Lord, deliver all of us from bitter roots: those caused by men and those that have resulted from your dealings with us. We acknowledge that you are God; you bought us with you blood; we owe you everything. Do with us as you please oh Lord. Give us a heart Lord to mean what we say when we utter the words, "I Trust You Lord". In Jesus' name. Amen!

Stephen L. Bening
a servant and prophet of our Lord Jesus Christ

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